rheasilvia: (Gasp!)
[personal profile] rheasilvia
An attack of inexplicable fannish nostalgia has me in its grip.

X-Files was my first real slash fandom, Mulder/Krycek my first OTP.

Remember this guy and his brilliant, obsessive mind, countless neuroses and dysfunctions, and pouty lower lip?
Fox William Mulder

How about this guy and his mysterious agenda, strange helpfulness, and brooding stalkerish ways?
Alex Krycek

Those were the days, my friends. That much chemistry, mindfuckery, government consipracies and alien abductions in one series are hard to find.

I loved the M/K corner of XF fandom. I met amazing people through it, and I had some of my best fannish experiences ever in it. Roughly ten years ago, however, I burned out on the fandom completely, to the point where I couldn't even re-read any of my fanfic favorites anymore.

This has never happened to me with any other fandom. Sure, there are many fandoms I don't have as much interest in anymore now as I used to - but I'd still happily read a good story with my OTP in any of those fandoms. Not so in XF. Why? I have no idea. It might have been a combination of factors - the absurd crash-and-burn the series canon suffered in its last three seasons, the fact that The Golden Age of M/K fic seemed to be in a decline and the authors I'd loved were leaving one by one, and who knows what else. I do remember that at one point, I felt as though every new story I saw was composed entirely of fandom clichés, with never an original line in sight.*

* (Which is not to say there were no good new stories being written. This may very well have been a symptom of my fannish burn-out; I suspected as much even then.)

Several days ago, I caught myself thinking about re-reading some of my old favorites. I'm not quite there yet, I think... but for the first time I think that I will be, someday. And I am glad. :-) Because I miss Mulder. I miss Krycek. I miss their explosive, twisted but weirdly functional dynamic and their incredible chemistry.

Also, you know what? I miss the oiliens. They were awesome.

I guess now I know how long it takes for fannish burn-out to start healing. ;-)
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